Another Hike - Roxie

I went on another hike with Abe today and fortunately it was an entirely different experience than my last one. Abe was such a loyal companion. I DID let him off leash and he didn’t get too far away from me this time and actually came to me when I called “here”. Perhaps that was the granola bar enticing him though, couldn’t be because he was actually behaving I’m sure. Well, once during the hike he did run helter skelter down to Swan Creek where a beaver dam had made a heavenly deep swimming hole just for him. He quickly dove in and then ran pell mell up the steep hill right to me – the whole thing took about five minutes and was a sight to behold so it was worth it. He’s such a beautiful beast and I was laughing at how fast he did the whole process.

I had a whole group of people hiking with me this time, too. There was Tom, John, Madonna, Tina, Stones (that’s stones, I wasn’t stoned), Stevie, Christie, Lindsay, Mick, even The Police came along. One guy with that group, I think he called himself Sting, even sang a love song just for me. Annie, Paul, Ringo, George, John, Bob, Candy, Chris, David, Delbert, some folks from a band called Queen and Eric also put their musical talents to work for my hearing pleasure.

We all sang along together. All in all, it was a delightful hike. I believe the difference in this hike and the last one was that Abe and I were alone. I think he feels some responsibility for me in a pack mentality sort of way. I know I’m not alpha to him but I am the bitch. And man, can I play that part well when it suits me! LOL

The Hike - Roxie

The hike began around 10:00 a.m. and the day was still damp from the previous night’s rainfall. Abe and Joey were eager to begin and both were excitedly tugging at their leashes. We climbed up the hill behind the house and let them both off their restraints. Joey is quite loyal and doesn’t travel too far away and so is Abe, usually. On this day he decided to go further and further ahead, relishing his freedom and the return of his pep and energy due to the cool air and even colder creeks. The weather we left behind in Texas was almost intolerable and he’d lost all his vim and vigor to apathy and reluctance to even venture outside. He loved the new climate and was madly exploring and cavorting all about.

As we neared the highway I thought it was time to rein Abe in so I began to yell his name loudly. When he didn’t respond I began to scream his name in a deafening screech. He was either deaf or ignoring me – I believe the latter. He finally appeared to have heard me and was returning in a very wide arc when he found it. The “it” he found was so loathsome, nasty, gross, rank, and disgusting I shudder to recall it’s nastiness. But Abe found it quite attractive. It was so appealing to him he decided to have a roll in it. Yes folks, he rolled around blissfully, all four feet moving in ecstasy and pure abandonment. I’ve never seen a dog enjoy rolling as much as he did in this instance. When I finally reached him I got a whiff of the repulsive odor and an eyeful of the ghastly yuck he was enjoying so immensely. This wasn’t just a dead animal, people. It was the worst maggot-infested, previously vomited pile of filth I’ve ever had the displeasure to encounter. And Abe had rolled in it.

To say I was angry with him at that moment is like saying “Awww, it’s too bad the Titanic sunk, those poor people.” I was beyond livid. I was ready to euthanize him, seriously. The thought of bathing him and having to actually touch his nasty ass fur with that revolting stench made me nauseous. I arranged the leash where he had to walk behind me – no way I was walking downwind of that.

We got home as quickly as we could – I bitched the entire return trip and Amy was in total agreement with me on all the ways I could do him in. I ranted – she smoothly approved of each and every horror I imagined for Abe. I tried to think of anything not to have to touch or smell him ever again. I was so damn mad!

I bathed the beast immediately upon our return and it came out in the wash, so to speak. I was angry with him all day but around 9:00 p.m. I finally sorta, kinda, forgave him, I think. He’s so lovable he’s hard to be angry at for long. I still won’t let him off the leash though. Uh-uh, ain’t happenin’!